August 13, 2008
Divine smackdown
Stuart Shepard of Focus on the Family says he was aiming at being “mildly humorous” in his video asking “lots of people” to pray for “torrential” rain two minutes before Obama gives his outdoor acceptance speech, an aim I think Shepard achieved:
Apparently, this video has gotten some people bent out of shape, but I think we ought to take Shepard up on it. He says that even though some other people will be praying that the weather be clear and mild, “it’s not a contest.” Well, why not? Let’s have a good old-fashioned Ba’al smackdown. Let’s all put on our prayer caps*, and if there isn’t a torrential rain exactly two minutes before Obama speaks, we’ll know which side G-d is on. Then, both sides can stop campaigning as the voters dutifully ratify G-d’s will.
So, no torrential rain two minutes before Obama speaks means the Republicans have to acknowledge that the Creator prefers the Democrat. I’m ready to take that bet!
*Attire may vary by religion. Consult your local priest, rabbi, imam, or Tom Cruise for details. Children of G-d are ineligible to enter. In case of dispute, whether the rain was “torrential” will be decided by an interfaith panel of meteorologists. “Two minutes before” will be interpreted as meaning two minutes before Obama is standing on his network-assigned mark. Given G-d’s well-known punctuality, but factoring in the time it takes for rain to descend, there will be a 3 second grace period given, so to speak. In case of tie, the winner will be decided by seeing whether the Republican convention is hit with a plague of lobbyists.
