December 17, 2021
My rules for saying “Merry Christmas”
As a non-observant Jew embedded in a Modern Orthodox family, here are my rules for when I say “Merry Christmas.”
To someone who wishes me a merry Christmas before or during Hanukkah, I reply, “And a happy Hanukkah to you.” If this counts as waging war on Christmas, I offer no apology.
For the week after Hanukkah, I tell known Jews “I hope you had a happy Hanukkah.”
After that, I say to another Jew, “Have a good holiday season” because there’s no getting around the fact that the Christian slow down of business for a few weeks is very pleasant, even for non-Christians. Perhaps especially for non-Christians.
To someone who has wished me happy holidays, I reciprocate with “And happy holidays to you.”
To someone who wishes me a merry Christmas after Hanukkah, I reply, “Have a happy holiday season,” hoping they take the “season” as rebuke even though no one ever seems to notice.
I have had these rules embossed on a small plastic tablet I carry with me. I plan on offering them for sale sometime around Passover/Easter.
