In the comments, Bill K raises the prospect of the G8 coming up with a No Continent Left Behind Act. Now we’re talking!

If it follows the educational version of the act, the No Continent Left Behind Act will require continents to be tested every year to ensure accountability. Those that do not get passing grades will be given two years to get their scores up. After that, they will be shut down and the population will be dispersed to higher-achieving continents.

Problem solved!

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As a follicly challenged American, and nothing to write home about even with a full head of hair, it is with some sympathy and reluctance that I post this photo. But, like a tourist who happens to be taking a snapshot when a UFO zooms past, on a date I won’t reveal in a city I won’t mention I snapped a street scene only to discover this person. At first I thought he was wearing a leather skull cap or had dipped his head in fast-drying liquid plastic. As I zoomed in, only with difficulty did my brain parse the retinal image…

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On the flight home from Paris a few days ago, one of the attendants announced over the intercom the creation of a new frickin’ flyer program. It took me a few seconds to realize she wasn’t cursing at us, but was instead talking about a frequent flyer program.

(Yes, I understand that I am in no position to make fun of the accent of a French woman speaking English since my point-and-grunt grasp of French sounds like the noise made by a drunk monkey.)

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Gary presents the first known instance of this nascent art form.

Thank goodness Gary hasn’t turned his genius to evil. [Technorati tags: GaryTurner humor]

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My brother and I are known to our family as “The Lumberjerks” not so much because we can’t drive a nail straight but because of the throroughness of our lack of familiarity with the basic properties of three dimensional space.

As I was constructing a simple set of bookshelves today, I discovered the following Lumberjerk principle: When fastening an object, every additional screw you put in increases the probability that you have positioned the object in the wrong place. [Technorati tag: diy]

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On the irc chat at Reboot, I got a straight line I’ll never get again. We were on a brief thread about how tired we all were. Someone posted “We’re brain dead.” I posted: “And some of us are Dane bred.”

What are the chances of the opportunity to use this Spoonerism ever arising again? Hence my shameless, context-free repeating of it here. Forgive me.

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Apparently “Ring Tone Dancer” is one of the leaders in the Contagious Media contest. I prefer the version my daughter and I made a few months ago. And, no, I am not biased in the least.

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With her new Aggregator 2.0, Jeneane is able to ignore up to 1,500 blog posts an hour…

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Q: Why don’t peanuts fly coach?

A: Not enough legume.

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I enjoyed Kottke’s riff… [Technorati tag: humor]

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