Last week, according to today’s Boston Globe (link breaks soon), Major General George W. Keefe of the National Guard received and forwarded a gag email about the Democratic convention that purported to be a schedule of events: “Opening flag burning ceremony,” a re-enactment of Kerry’s Tossing of the Medals, and “Sen. Kennedy proposes a toast” (six times).

Ok, so maybe it’s not the funniest gag email you’ve ever seen. But Keefe felt forced to apologize for forwarding it after Mayor Mumbles Menino fulminated against it: “It’s unfortunate that an adjutant general of the National Guard has the time on his hands to say things about the greatest senator America has ever had.” So, Menino’s complaint is that people who are worth their salaries don’t have time to forward an email. Oh, and people ought to not to be allowed to disagree with his hyperbolic assessment of his friend, Ted Kennedy.

The state rep from the proud city of Melrose was also furious, saying that Keefe “should be loyal only to the charge of keeping order…This is a serious breach, and he ought to be called on the carpet for it.” Then he manages to tie it to Iraq: “People are dying in Iraq. Don’t make fun of that and then pass it around.” (Fun Tip: Imagine those words coming from David Brent, the manager on the BBC’s The Office.)

The chair of the state Democratic party pretended to be outraged that Keefe lost work time forwarding the email: “It is embarrassing and ridiculous that a state employee would be spending his time sending nasty partisan e-mails, rather than doing his job.” Then he manages to tie this to the fact that the Democratic party in the most Democratic party state in the country can’t manage to get a Democratic governor elected: “The governor reappointed [Keefe] after he sent this foolish e-mail, and he ought to be reprimanded for doing it. This speaks volumes about what kind of administration this is.”

Hmm, so let’s weigh this out. On the one hand, we have the loss of approximately 60 seconds of work time and on the other we have the right to free speech. Clearly, the two sides of the balance are so evenly matched that there’s no way to figure out which to support. So, here’s my solution: Require General Keefe to stay a minute late one night, preferably wearing an orange jump suit. Only then can this great injustice be righted!

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