The Science of Michael Jackson
The intentionally funny Annals of Improbable Research‘s free newsletter has unearthed the following research:
“Mandibular Angle Augmentation with the Use of Distraction and Homologous Lyophilized Cartilage in a Case of Morphing to Michael Jackson Surgery,” M.Y. Mommaerts, J.S. Abeloos, H. Gropp, Annales de Chirurgie Plastique et Esthetique, vol. 46, no. 4, August 2001, pp. 336-40. The authors, who are at Hôpital General Saint-Jean, Bruges, Belgium, explain that:
This article presents a combination of distraction osteogenesis and lyophilized cartilage used to three- dimensionally over-augment the mandibular angle of a long-face prognathic patient who had the wish to be morphed to Michael Jackson or at least as far as current technique and his endogenic features allowed.
A bird’s-eye view of the article (with some of its photographs!) is here.
So, we may have found the only thing weirder than Michael Jackson: a guy who wants to undergo extensive surgery in order to look like Michael Jackson. On purpose.
The Michael Jackson Plan
Michael Jackson is going to jump bail and move to India.
There is growing evidence; The Avatar of Neverland is going to relocate to land of magic. Sources say, Michael Jackson has entered into negociations with Gruru Sai Baba to joint venture in a new shrine. “There are an infinite number of 12 year old hindu boys in India.” Yes Michael, there are lots of Hindu Boys in India but the number is finite.
http://scari.org/social_paradox.html
The Plan is to move their respective temples to Auroville, the experimental community south of Madras.
http://scari.org/auroville.html
Neverland and the Ashram of Sai Baba will merge into a unified theology sympathetic to the goals and ideals of the Aurovillians. The Golden Orb is ready for a makeover and new masters, the devotees are waiting for new leadership and the climate is ripe for a new look.
The Pundit, Mickey Ganesh has long forcast this merger of East and West.
Good luck in you vision-quest Michael.
Mickey Ganesh: Pundit
I just saw a picture of Michael Jackson on msn.com entertainment (1/27/07). What in the hell did he do to his lips while out of the country?????